Rough patches in life

I am very angry with my Louis, never feel so frustrated in my life. I hate that my emotion revolved around him sometime. I hate that I am affected by him. I hate losing the cool and I hate being so emotional. I want to move away from that and I want to be myself and Love myself. Current stage of me...I hate everything around me. I hate that I have work doubly hard, I hate that I hate my MIL, I hate that I have to make decision that revolved around twins. I hate that I have to be dependence on others. I am feeling tired and alone...I hate everything. I hate that I have to tell myself to be positive. I hate that I have to encourage others, I hate that I have to manage other people expectation.