To live I need to DIE

It has been a long struggled, things get complicated, productive compromised, emotion got affected and negative energy surround me. It is a realisation of hard truth and I have decided to stop fighting..let go and let me die. I have to die to live...I have decided to join the gang of super fake, super insincere, super inconsistence, bias, unreasonable, unscrupulous and the list goes on.It is ok to twist and turn our words, it is ok to take side and push blame to others. Sounds bad? Not really, this is the true world that we are living in. I used to believed in treating our business parters nice, fair and professionally, turned out, this might be my own wishful thinking. The slogan and believed that I have been holding on for the past ten years seem to be wrong wrong, I have been following the wrong direction. Very sad but all this shall change. Any changes will be painful, especially I have to let go of my faith..I need alochol.

不直的。

真的不直的为了一个小人伤心难过。他永远不会知道也不会有任何悔意，竟然如此，不如放下。

Spending quality time with the twins individually

I read from twins parents blogs that spending quality time with the twins individually is very important cause they are unique individual and I would need to bond with them in their own little way.

I thought I can only do this when they are older, wrong. I managed to spend our little quality time together today. In the morning, after Sincere woke up, I decided to bring him out to the market while Righteous and Louis are still sleeping. We drove to the market, had a morning walk around the few blocks and bought breakfast back. Had happy bonding time with my son.

In the afternoon, since Righteous woke up late, I brought her out for a quick shopping while Sincere had his nap at home with Louis. Righteous really enjoy the shopping trip, typical girl. We also visited aunty Dan on the way home.

Now, both of them are tired and trying to sleep. It is Louis time to bond with them while I take my break. Louis always get the better deal when dealing with the twins...all he needs to do is to sleep with them.

Doing research

Weekend is here and I ma reading up some of the articles on 'Why my toddler do not nap'?? I am face with this problem last weekend when Righteous simply refuse to nap for both days, she is obviously tired but refuse to give in. Come night time, she again refuse to stay in the bed room and wanted to go out and play. I am alone most of the time and I need to keep both of them together. I need them to nap so that we get enough rest, but this is really not easy. The article offer some comfort but not able to provide solution that could solve the problem. Guess i am on my own on this topic and i will have to trial and error to try out what works best for the twins. Feeling sleepy already.