Lady Gaga

I am not a fan of Lady Gaga but I have the honour to be invited for her sold out concert in Singapore by one of my business partner. Even though I am not a fan but I was excited and looking forward to the concert. Her concert was indeed spectacular and her vocal is really powerful and good. She sang live and dance for 2 hour plus. She is indeed amazing.

What impresses me most during the concert was, she shared that she worked very hard and work every single day, she work hard for what she like and what she believed...music.

Many people overlooked the hard work that these Diva put in to be where she is today. Everyone wants her glamour but do not know the pain and work that she need to go thru to stand on the stage. I like her message to her fans and audience. She said, one must work very hard for your dream and the fact that music connect people.

After her concert, I am even more certain that I must let the twins learn music, I think music will nurture a person character one way or another. In my eyes, music open heart, open opportunities, open possibilitie and create a channel of communication and release. I have always aspired to be musically trained (can't be talented) but I failed many times. I do not have the flare, I only have the dream. Thus, I am pinning my litte dream and aspiration on them,music will do them good.

Congratulation to my dear friend

I am so happy for my friend because she is pregnant. It wasn't easy and when she told me she was pregnant, I cried. This is the first time that I cried hearing such good news. I don't remember crying when I was pregnant.

I am going to be the Godma and and nobody is going to fight with me for that role. I am going to be mummy again!! Hahaha

Motherhood journey is not easy but it is not going to bring us down. We will survive and we will do a great job.

Dear friend, rest well, the pregnancy journey will be full of anticipation and the day when you meet your little one, the emotion will be strong but all that you went thru is nothing and all worthwhile when you saw the smile.

Welcome to motherhood and the next phase of your life. We will be there to be your support pillar and we will learn and grow together. One day when the kids grew up and no longer need us, we will have each other to travel and party all over again.

Precious child

Witness a case of a little girl crying hysterically looking for her mother at a busy tourist spot. She is probably 3-4 years old, we notice her and our eyes followed her while she aim and search for her mum endlessly. We looked out for her in case she fall into hands of bad guys as well as we want to know where is the mother and if she is also looking for the poor kid.

The little girl finally found the mother and guess what we saw? The mother was busy taking photo for her little boy and we bet she didn't even notice that her little girl went missing. The mother offer no comfort when she saw the crying little girl and she carried on with her photo taking. A man who appeared to be the father offer no comfort to the poor girl too. After the mother finally finish with photo taking, she turned around and look at the girl, instead of offering her a big hug, she push her to the father. I stood there looking at the family and I felt so sorry for the little girl.

The little girl could be naughty and roam around without the parents permission or it could be the parents got distracted by some stuffs and forgot about the little girl. Whatever is the reason, the parents failed to protect their little girl and expose her to potential risk and danger.

Am I feeling emotionally affected because I am a mother myself? Maybe, since protecting our children is something very nature. A mother do not need to be taught to know what's the right things to do. Yet, I might be taking common sense and common responsbiliy for granted.

Not meeting the twins over the weekend

I will be joining for team for a trip Malacca and will not be seeing my twins over the weekend. What this mean is, i will not see them straight for 10 days. That is actually a long period of time. As they grew older, I do enjoy the time with them more but only with additional help. One is two ratio is still a bad equation for me.

I am such a contractivity person, on one hand I am looking forward to the trip and the break,on the other, I am missing the babies and wish that the trip is cancel. I am really such a flicker minded person. Long gone are the days when I can be free and do whatever I want without much hesitation but now, I just think, worry, plan, worry and worry alot more.

Am I a terrible mother??

These days I have these thought and wonder if I am a terrible mother? I am so comfortable in leaving them with my nanny and I felt so relieved and happy when they are not with me. Dosen't sound too right, isn't it?

In fact, they have been very good babies, they are healthy and loveable. I must tell myself to be grateful and count my blessing. I love my babies and totally grateful for having them, I just need to tell myself to enjoy, embrace and stop worrying.

Our plan to stop the mosquitoes from attacking our babies

I seriously think the mosquitoes at home are driving my babies and me nuts. Their attacked causes the babies to wake up and unable to fell back to sleep peacefully. Definitely pain my heart to see them scatching themselves and feeling uncomfortable.

We have decided to take on the mosquitoes. We have planted Lemon scented aroma througout the house. We have bought different repellent at home, the cream type, spray type and candle. We have 3 UV insect killer at home and have learn from website about using Lemon as the nature remedies to chase away the insect. We are trying my best and will do whatever we can to achieve that goal.

However, if everything else fail then we will rent out the house and move to somehere that is of higher floor and mosquitoes free as well as bigger space. Parents really do all things for the sake of their kids!!!

Thank you!!

I am grateful for the help that I have received on Friday and saturday when I am suppose to be alone with the twins. My mum and aunt came on Friday and they help with the twins and allowed me to nap peacefully in the afternoon which was so heavenly.

My friend, came over on sat evening and that really took the stress out of me. Really grateful for the time and help from the deep deep bottom of my heart.

Dear lord, please continue to watch over the twins and my family. Please give them good health and let them grow up happy. Amen lord

Good records and looking back

I have the habit of looking back at my own blog to recall and remembered events and activities that had passed. Glad that I started this blog earlier and some of my life events was recorded when it happened.

Without the blog, I won't be able to remember the IVF journay and how I managed to clear the pregnancy without much fanfare. There are happy incidents and there are some that bring tears to my eyes whenever I read the blog.

Till today, I still can't really express how much I missed my grandma and I will read my blog to remember the day she left me. I never want to forget how grandma look like and how she loves me. I seriously missed her.

Learning to let God

I have not been to church for a long time and in recent months, I have the strong desired to be back. Probably because the twins made me realized that I need someone with greater power and I desperately need God to guide me and watch over me.

At times when I am totally helpless, God is my only way out. I have prayed to him in difficult time and not pray when things get better. This is terrible, I know. I need to get thing back in prospective and I want the twins to grow up in his Grace.

Dear lord, pls forgive my sin and my ignorance the day I walked away. My body, soul and mind are weak and I need your protection over me. Please give the patience and wisdom on handling the twins, I want them to live up to the name that we have given them. Always Sincere and Righteous. May you protection them against all odds and allow them to grow up healthy, happy and be useful. Thank you lord, Amen.

News that bother

Parenthoods really changes us, like it or not. That is no option given and more often than not, the changes make us paranoid, worried and scared.

First, came on the news on HFMD, this used to be a piece of news until I became a mother. Now, to me HFMD is a scary and dirty word, the mentioned of it scared the shit out of me.

Then came the news of attempt abduction at Ang mo Kio hub. In the past, again this will be just a news and discussion topic but now, it is a real concern to me. Singapore is no longer safe and how should I watch out for my kids when we go out??

Many time, we heard other parents talking about how good is parenthoods but not how worried they are as parents. Are we really only suppose to talk about the good and not the bad?? When I feel less than worthy and competent, what should I do?? I can't force myself to stay positive with all the worried and concern that I have. I need to know that i can received help when I need to and I will be alright and all this shall pass!!

Weekend with the Twins

Sincere is recovering from his cold that he has been having for about two weeks. He still has abit of block nose and that kept him awake at the nite. Really heartache to see him toss and turn, trying to find the right position to sleep. I can't do much but stay up and watch him to ensure that he is ok.

Now, he is trying to sleep, hopefully the block nose will clear with the nose drop that I gave him earlier. My poor baby boy.

Righteous has recovered and other than a attention seeking girl when she is awake, she is really a sweeties and always so cheerful and happy. She is learning and able to follow some direction these days, thing are getting more fun and of cos challenging.

Happy 1st birthday to Sincere and Righteous

Same time last year, we welcome the arrived of our twins and now they are turning one.

It has been a wonderful journey with lots of challenges and we foresee the road ahead will be full of colours and we are looking forwards to watch them grow.

Happy birthday, my darlings and we love you!!

Double trouble

The twins started my weekend with running nose, sleepless night and trip to KKH A&E. Was exhausted but grateful that they gets better after taking the medication.

They also managed to sleep alittle longer. When the doctor told the type of running nose medicine i could opt for my twins, i immediately go for the one that said 'may have sedative effect'. That's a brainless choice right? All of us need the sleep.

Thursday night!!

Looking forwards to having the babies home over the weekend. Missed them, I went over to HongKong last week and didn't bring them home for more than 10 days, yeah, that is a long time. They better still remember mummy and daddy.

Just clean out the house, getting ready to welcome them home. To note, i will be home alone with them over the weekend and that will be good bonding time.

Learning to be grateful once again

The twins decided to be naughty at night over the weekend. They take turn to woke up at night and i never get a sleep, ok maybe i slept for 2 hours before the none stop routine of waking every hour started.

I was frustrated and very impatience with the babies. Louis woke up to help but i am still helpless, i don't know what do they want.

But i told myself to be grateful, they are probably just as helpless and exhausted as i am and needed a bit of comfort here and there.

Came morning, two of them just give me their widest smile and I guess this is the joy that all parents are talking about.